The Last Cigarette
by BlazingxSoul
Summary: Your love’s like one last cigarette... I will savor it, the last cigarette... take it in and hold your breath, hope it never ends...but when it’s gone, it’s gone ::Tifax?::


**The Last Cigarette**

_A TifaxReno One Shot

* * *

_

Tifa thought she knew what she was getting herself into, but she greatly underestimated the situation. She tried to adapt and live with her decisions, but right now she was just being used. Running away was never her style, but here was necessary. Straightening up from her packing, she listened to see if he was home. Deeming it safe, she slung the bag over her shoulder and quickly walked down the hall, hoping for a quick escape… but he caught her.

"Tifa!" He cried, "Where ya' goin'?"

She turned around and absent-mindedly noticed he was home early, and not as drunk as he usually was. "I'm leaving."

He snorted, "Leaving? Alright, lemme know when you're comin' back."

"I'm not."

He froze, his hazed eyes focusing on her face, "Tifa…?"

"I'm done – I can't do this, I won't."

His glowing blue eyes narrowed. "Can't do what? Pretend you love me?"

"I don't have to pretend about that," She said softly, "but I have to pretend like I'm okay with what you do in your free time."

He blinked, trying again. "Tifa…"

"Just… shut up!" She cried, her voice cracking. He froze, unused to seeing her like this. "You… it's like I fell in love with the perfect man and as soon as I enter his life, he becomes the man of my nightmares!"

He gave her a menacing snarl, "So I'm some monster to you now?" He asked.

"Yes, yes you are!" Tifa cried, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over. "You come home every night, so drunk you can't even tell me _your own name_! But that's when you even _decide_ to come home **at all**! Between the bar and work, I only see you drunk, and I hate it!" The tears had begun and were unstoppable now. Tifa's strong visage cracked, and her true pain came through. She didn't even try to stop it. "Who are you these days? Do you even love me anymore? You never show it or say anything… especially when you bring a **another woman** home!" Now she was screaming, wine eyes overflowing with angry tears. "You bring a _woman_, a **DIFFERENT** woman, home when I'm _waiting_ for you with open arms! Are you blind behind your screen of women, booze, and cigarettes? ARE YOU?"

When he just stood there in absolute shock, she let out one final cry and sprinted out the front door into the pouring rain.

: - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - :

Reno didn't move for a long time. Absolute silence rang in his ears. Infinite darkness swam in his vision.

Nothing moved; nothing happened; nothing existed.

His world… was gone.

The door was cracked open, having not shut upon his love's departure. He shouldn't call her that anymore, she wasn't his, not after what he did… but he could not even begin to call her anything else. The force of the rain had pushed the door open even more, soaking the light brown carpet. Lightning flashed, illuminating the clean and dead room.

The Turk slowly sank to his knees, folding his legs around him and hugging one knee to his chest. They were strong yet frail, unsure of what to do without a woman… her, inside of them. A dead cheek was rested upon the top of his knee and glowing aquamarine eyes died and closed. Blue clad shoulders began to shake silently, glistening trails running down the pale skin. But when the anguished cries came through, even they did not pierce the crushing silence.

* * *

**A Week Later…**

The phone never stopped ringing it seemed; the clock never stopped ticking, the door never shut, nor did it open. It was open farther now though, the wind having pushed it open. But it let out a small creak when someone slammed it against the wall. A cell phone snapped shut and the phone on the wall finally ceased its song.

"What do you want?"

Sunlight flashed off of black sunglasses. "Just to talk."

Reno snorted, "Talking won't help me."

Rude shrugged, coming in and closing the door with an echoing click. Reno seemed to wilt; she really was gone. The air was now tense – the door had been shut. There was no going back, no pretending that it didn't happen. The red headed Turk hung his head from his spot on the couch, his limp hair hanging down in his face and blocking his eyes from the newly reestablished darkness. The bald Turk frowned and came to squat in front of his best friend. "Can you at least tell me what happened?"

Reno just shook his head, not wanting to confirm and admit to reality. The silence stretched out and he couldn't take it anymore. Taking in a deep breath and letting it back out, he prepared himself to admit his greatest fear. "She's gone."

Rude's eyebrows rose behind his trademark glasses. He knew that Reno would just bounce back after something like this, but it obviously wasn't going to happen this time.

"She left because of the women?" He asked.

His friend nodded, "And because of the drinking… and cigarettes."

"Are you honestly surprised?" Rude asked, "You were jumping into the pot the day she moved in – you know that. With the way you've been treating her, I'm surprised she even stayed this long." He stated, pausing and lowering his voice. "How could you do something like this to a woman like Tifa?"

Reno just shook his head. "Because I'm a horrible person Rude, I won't deny it. I'm the worst in the book." He reached for a pack of cigarettes in reassurance, but stopped halfway. The Turk clenched his hand tightly and stuffed it behind his back. One of Rude's eyebrows rose in question.

"I'm going to quit." Reno said firmly, looking into his friend's shaded eyes.

Rude frowned; Reno quitting anything was something that never happened… ever. "You say that quitting is for people that are weak."

The red head groaned. "Rude, you don't understand… I am weak!" He stood up, grabbed the pack of cigarettes and threw them in the trash, his eyes blazing with unexpected anger.

The bald Turk let out a rare chuckle, standing up straight. "That was pretty strong."

"I'll be buying another pack later, watch." His friend replied miserably, closing his eyes.

"Understandable." Rude stated; crossing the room and putting a firm hand on his friend's once iron shoulder. "You can stay with me… if you don't want to stay here by yourself."

A ghost of a smirk appeared on Reno's face. "Thanks. Besides, someone needs to keep the cancer sticks away from me."

* * *

**Two Weeks Later…**

Days just crept by, never ending it seemed. Reno found himself craving a cigarette so badly it was driving him insane. Rude suggested that he try and cut back instead of giving up all together, but Reno absolutely refused. He refused to say why because he knew his friend would think it extremely ridiculous… and sad.

He refused because she had left so abruptly, his only real happiness. So the only thing that kept him going was going to be ripped from his as well.

To himself, he sounded like a fool.

But fighting the nicotine and the urge for a beer, or even some company, only became worse when someone came by for an unexpected visit… with a pack of addiction.

"Tseng?" Rude questioned, opening the door to admit his friend and boss.

The man grinned, taking his cigarette out of his mouth to talk. "Hey Rude. Do you know where Reno is? I couldn't find him at his place."

"Right here, Ts-" The red head began, coming out of the living room only to stop dead, eyes wide when they fell upon the smoking stick between Tseng's fingers. The urge, the need, for one of those heavenly sticks grew almost unbearable. He cleared his throat and tried to act cool, but Tseng saw it. He quickly put it out and flicked it over the stair rail.

He smiled apologetically and stepped inside, "How are you doing, Reno?"

The Turk glared. "You're wrong if you think I'm fine."

The red head was irritable at times to begin with, and the absence of nicotine wasn't helping. Reno at first was appalled at how snappy and sarcastic he was, but Rude told him not to worry about it – he had a good reason. Besides, he wouldn't take any offense to anything he could think of to say. The Turk still felt bad about if from time to time, and felt slightly afraid, unsure of how his boss would respond to the not-so-friendly tone.

Tseng just shrugged. "Of course you're not fine. You're just damn peachy." Reno smiled slightly at the reply, knowing that he was still in the clear.

"So, what is it Tseng?" Rude asked, getting back to the topic of Tseng's purpose for the drop-in visit.

The Wutain Turk smiled. "I was actually wondering where Reno was. Once I found him I was going to ask you guys if you wanted to go out for some drinks tonight." When silence greeted him, Tseng frowned. "What, you've given up drinks too, Reno?"

No response.

Tseng rolled his eyes.

* * *

Reno starred glumly at the beer in front of him, his mouth starting to water, his body begging for it. But his mind and heart knew how many more would follow it.

"Drink it, Reno. I all ready paid for it." Tseng ordered. "You want to change. I get that. But you can't change everything all at once. Take Rude's advice and just cut back."

He would have protested, but the look on Tseng's face left no room for argument. A slender hand picked up the brown bottle and took a swig. Aqua blue eyes closed in pleasure as the liquid ran down the back of his throat, and Reno leaned over the bar, resting upon his elbows. For the first time in almost a month, he completely relaxed. His pounding headache dulled a bit, and tense shoulders slowly unknotted. Tseng put a hand on his friend's shoulder, leaning forward to see his face. Reno's shoulders didn't move, and he made no noise. Yet crystal tears leaked from his oceanic eyes, down the smooth yet hardened shell of his face. Tseng said nothing, knowing he was remembering something… someone very important.

_Regrets are all you left on your lipstick stains  
Take a picture of our past there in that ashtray  
We had our fun, used to light your flame  
Like the dancing smoke that rose  
We tried to find our way  
No one told me, she told me _

Reno chuckled, his voice about to break. "Have you heard this song, Tseng?"

The man blinked, removing his hand from Reno's shoulder. "No… I can't say that I have. Why do you ask?"

"Rude?"

The bald Turk nodded once. "Yes."

Tseng's brow furrowed, "What song is it?"

Reno chuckled again, this time with a bitter tone. "The song of my life."

_Your love's like one last cigarette, last cigarette  
I will savor it, the last cigarette  
Take it in and hold your breath, hope it never ends  
But when it's gone it's gone  
The last cigarette_

Tseng looked at his red-haired friend, eyes worried. "Reno… don't beat yourself up-"

"Beat myself up?" He repeated, looking up. "Tseng, there's nothing left of me **to** beat up. Don't you see that? My life just became pointless once the door shut.

"More importantly, this is beyond true!" Reno continued, eyes wild. "She's gone – gone for good, just like my life!" His eye seemed to die, and he looked at the bar counter before he spoke again. "I can change, but it won't make her come back. I'm doing it because I know that's what she wanted me to do so long ago…"

"Reno…" Tseng began, pulling out two items from his pocket. "One more – your last."

The once fiery Turk looked at his almost heaven in agony, took it and its best friend with shaking fingers and stood. He headed outside to the cold air, but the music followed him even there.

_Just to breath reminds me of what used to be  
The smoke's the ghost that keeps you close when I can't sleep  
Don't ask the past to last; it's about to change  
The memories don't answer when I call your name  
No one told me, she told me_

The cold brick of the bar kept Reno on the ground as he looked at the small object in his hand.

A cigarette.

THE cigarette.

The last one… his last one.

_'This is for old time's sake…'_ He thought, placing it in his mouth and cupping the end and lighting it with practiced ease. He placed the lighter back in a coat pocket, taking a long drag of his forbidden pleasure.

_Your love's like one last cigarette, last cigarette  
I will savor it, the last cigarette  
Take it in and hold your breath, hope it never ends  
But when it's gone, it's gone_

The cigarette was hard to keep hold of it was trembling so much. Every drag of smoke and nicotine saved him from insanity yet pulled him deeper into his hell. But the bliss it brought made him weak with relief – the pain was gone, if only for a moment. Every saving and damning drag brought her smiling face, a caressing hand, a gentle kiss back to him. But it vanished every time like a slap of a hand, a flood of tears, and the click of a door.

He sank to the ground, the cigarette dancing precariously in long and shaking fingers. How badly he wanted the release, but how much it hurt…

_The last cigarette, the last cigarette  
__One I can't forget, the last cigarette  
__Right there on my fingertips, got your taste still on my lips  
__Right or wrong  
__You're still gone, gone, gone, gone, gone, gone…_

_No one told me, she told me  
You always lose the girl in a Brian Wilson world_

He could remember the times when he was sober and she wouldn't leave his side for anything. She'd pull him along if she needed to do something, and he'd follow her everywhere like a lovesick puppy. He laughed bitterly at himself – he had been. Sadly enough, he _liked_ the feeling, he _craved_ her attention, he _lived_ for her alone. Yet he mistreated her, completely ruined what ever she saw in him.

He felt a soft hand trace the once handsome features of his face, and he franticly tried to grasp the long forgotten hand. But it was just a memory, something he really wanted to return home.

But the door she closed remained shut.

_One last cigarette, I will savor it  
Take it in and hold your breath, hope it never ends  
But when it's gone, it's gone_

He hated the closed door; he hated the empty shell he had become. Many would blame the person who had done this to them, but he did not. What happened was brought upon him by his own actions, and he wouldn't run from the fact. Shoulders stopped shaking and a pale hand wiped away his telltale tears. He raised the cigarette to his mouth, but stopped. His eyes remained closed as he sighed, and then the famous grin returned to his cocky face. He could remember the times, life in the memories… but he would not do so any longer. Not like this.

_One last cigarette, the last cigarette  
__I will savor it, the last cigarette  
__Take it in and hold your breath, hope it never ends_

There was no turning back, not now. His mind had been made up and there would be no changing it. Legs moved and the strengthened body stood up, the weakness it once contained seeping out. The hand holding the cigarette lowered, and the fingers opened. It silently crashed to the soaked pavement and the flame sputtered. A black boot stepped on top of it, ending its reign.

But when it's gone, it's gone 

Aqua blue eyes snapped open and the old fire was back. Crunching the cigarette into the dust, he pitched his friend's lighter into the trash and walked away from the bar. It was now or never.

The memories would never leave, and some would be painful, but they made him who he was. He couldn't pretend to be something else.

She wouldn't come back not matter what he did, no matter how hard he tried, not matter how badly he wanted it. She was a ghost, the smoke of a cigarette, that would be with him forever.

Reno was all right with that.

_The last cigarette, last cigarette  
__One I can't forget, the last cigarette  
__Right there on my fingertips, got your taste still on my lips  
__Right or wrong_

The redheaded Turk crossed the street with his hands in his pockets, face hard and strong with his new decision. A woman he passed by looked at him, stunned. But he didn't notice, nor did he care. The bar, and the song, faded into the distance but his mind and heart let it play on.

_The last cigarette  
__No one told me (The last cigarette)  
__She told me (The last cigarette)_

Reno walked down the sidewalk and turned down his street, allowing the darkness to swallow him. But nothing would put out his flame. Not even a sad memory.

_The last cigarette_

* * *

Tifa entered her bar, confused. Was that… Reno walking home? That looked nothing like a man who had just lost a woman… far from to be exact. She looked up and gave a start when she saw Tseng and Rude sitting at the counter, her second in command serving them. She looked up and smiled, greeting her by name.

The two Turks spun around, Tseng's eyes wide while Rude kept his cool. The wine eyed beauty slowly walked forward and smiled nervously, knowing that this wasn't going to be a pleasant reunion for all of them.

"Did you see Reno out there?" Rude asked, wondering where his friend had gone.

"Dang it… he has my lighter…" Tseng muttered.

Tifa shook her head. "He wasn't outside. As a matter of fact, he didn't have a cigarette either. He was walking home… looking really…"

"He didn't look miserable." Rude finished, a rare smirk crossing his face.

She looked at him, puzzled. "No… he didn't."

Tseng laughed, "Oh he still gets me sometimes…"

Her brow creased, "What's going on?"

"He's been an absolute wreak." Rude explained, "He wouldn't touch a beer, didn't see anyone, and absolutely refused to smoke even one cigarette. The one Tseng gave him, his last one, was his first in almost a month."

Tifa's world went spinning. Were they serious? Did he really give up everything? But why? Why would Reno do something like that? It made sense for him to turn to those things, lean more heavily upon them because she was gone… what changed?

"I think that the cigarettes and everything else reminded him of you." Tseng answered, his eyes serious. "We nearly drug him out here – he absolutely wanted nothing to do with a bar."

She looked down, her dark eyes filling up. She knew he'd be a mess, but she didn't think that he'd change in her memory… change like she always wanted him to.

Rude put a hand on her shoulder, an odd but comforting gesture. "You know… he hasn't moved."

Her head jerked up, her eyes wide. "Are you kidding me? Do you want me to go back there?"

Tseng smiled at her reassuringly. "If Rude didn't mean it, he wouldn't have suggested it. I think it's a good idea, he really does miss you. Do you miss him?"

Tifa looked back down at the ground again. "Yes…"

"Then this decision should be very easy!" Tseng cried happily, putting his hand on her other shoulder. "Go back home, Tifa."

Rude squeezed her shoulder, paid for all of their drinks and stood up. "Come on, we'll walk with you."

When Tseng nodded in agreement, Tifa wiped away a few tears. "Thank you."

"No, thank you for coming back." Tseng replied, putting an arm around her shoulders.

: - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - :

Reno sat on his couch, the TV on mute. He just starred at it blankly, looking more at the room itself than what was on. He hadn't been home in two weeks… he almost forgot how empty this place was. Maybe he should get another place-

No. It would just feel smaller, which would remind him of his stupid mistake. He groaned, leaning his head back against the couch. He had made his mind up to not let this make him miserable, but it wasn't really working, not when he was back here, sitting on the couch that they used to cuddle up on… along with some other things…

He let out a growl, standing up and going into the kitchen to grab a beer but stopped, knowing that he didn't have any in there, and if he did he wouldn't drink one. Growling again, he just stood in the hallway. Heading to their bedroom would just make it that much worse.

When there was a knock at the door, Reno felt like screaming. Who had the perfect timing to come visit him? He felt like opening the door and then slamming it in their face. When the knock was heard again, Reno threw himself onto the couch and raised his voice.

"You're perfectly able to open the door by yourself Rude!"

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Rude smirked, "He has no clue."

"I'm not sure if I can do this." Tifa said, her face white.

Tseng frowned. "Do not make me open the door and throw you inside. We've talked about this, you need to open the door."

"You guys, you seriously can't expect this to be easy!"

: - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - : - :

Reno frowned when he heard the woman's voice come in through the slightly open window, and his heart rose. Was that-?

NO.

He was _not_ going to do this to himself. It was probably just someone playing a prank – a mean prank – on him. But when the creak of a door was heard, he bolted into the hallway, his head turning down to face the slightly open door.

No one was in sight, and the Turk knew that the person on the other side had not come in yet. But… who was there?

The door open slowly, creaking on its hinges. Reno hesitantly stepped out to stand in the middle of the hallway, aqua blue eyes fixed upon the opening door.

His heart stopped when it banged slightly on the adjacent wall, his eyes wide with his mouth slightly open.

This wasn't… no… this wasn't possible…

She couldn't be here.

But there she stood in all of her radiance, looking at him fearfully, unsure of his reaction to her return. But he took one small step forward and reached a hand out to her, his oceanic optics threatening to leak.

"Please… please don't tell me this is a dream…"

She had opened the door again, opened the door into his soul. She looked frightened and sad, but he wanted to make her laugh and smile… feel protected and warm. He took another step, and one tear managed to roll down his face for the second time that night.

_**Just to breath reminds me of what used to be  
**__**The smoke's the ghost that keeps you close when I can't sleep  
**__**Don't ask the past to last, it's about to change  
**_**_The memories don't answer when I call your name  
__No one told me, she told me_**

"Please don't tell me you're going to leave again, Tifa."

Her wine colored eyes filled to the brim, and she let them fall as she let out a sob, dashing inside into his waiting arms. More tears joined hers as she crashed into him, sending him stumbling back a few steps. But he managed to catch himself and hold Tifa for dear life as he cried into her hair.

Hands traced every curve and outline of her back, hips, and shoulders, crying all the while. She cried into his chest, her arms linked and locked behind his neck, never going to let go. Rude and Tseng watched through the open door, and the bald Turk turned to leave, grabbing his boss by the arm and dragging him silently down the stairs. Their part was over. Now it was all her.

"Reno…" She gasped through her tears, trying to pull away.

"No." He said softly and forcefully, gripping her tighter. "No… just… stay here."

"I'll always stay here," She replied, "Just let me see you."

His arms reluctantly loosened their grip to allow her to step back. His aquamarine eyes locked on her wine ones as she raised a hand to place it on his cheek.

"How can you ever forgive me, Reno?"

"You didn't do anything wrong – it was me."

Tifa normally would have convinced him that it wasn't his fault, but didn't want to start an argument over it. Who cared – it was all in the past anyway, something they would look back on and thank the stars that they were together again. He closed his eyes, raising his own hand to cover hers and pull it away from his face. His eyes were gentle, drinking in the very sight of her, his arms and body memorizing how perfectly she fit against him.

_**The last cigarette, the last cigarette  
**__**One I can't forget, the last cigarette  
**_**_Right there on my fingertips, got your taste still on my lips  
__Right or wrong_**

He slowly placed both hands on her cheeks and leaned down, placing a feather light kiss upon her lips that soon became much less gentle as soon as she melted into him. Reno grinned against her lips and tilted her back, making a surprised squeal emit from her mouth, which just made him laugh. He scooped her up in his arms, walked toward the door, slammed it shut and escorted her to their room, where he intended to rest… after an hour or so.

**_The last cigarette_**

**_

* * *

_**

A/N: I live! **-le gasp-**

Yes, hate me, this is what I was doing with my spare time. I'm so sorry! **::sobs::** It was just so good... I couldn't refrain myself!

But I honestly wanted to try my hand at RenoxTifa... what do y'all think!? xD

If you're wondering where I am in my updating process, check my profile. I honestly do keep it updated, really! ((lol))

The song is "The Last Cigarette" by Bon Jovi, which is just a cool song. I'm sorry, hate me that I write this and don't update anything else! **::dodges flying veggies::**

Review please! xD

-Vincent's Angel of Chaos


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